tiny comic – Nicole Smeltzer

Re-reading Emily of New Moon

Emily stands next to a cat. Ilse: You blithering centipede.

Emily bends to pet the cat. Ilse: You're a skunk and a bloodthirsty mink!

Emily walks away cuddling the cat. Ilse: YOU PROUD, STUCK-UP, CONCEITED BIPED!!

I’m keeping a catalogue of Ilse’s best insults.

Norman Disagrees

Norman the cat scratches at an ottoman. Out of panel, a voice yells "NORMAN!"

Norman pauses. I say: No, Norman. No!

Norman thinks.

Norman returns to his scratching thinking: Norman says yes.

March 7, 2020March 9, 2020

Don’t Put Maows in My Mouth

Illustration of a cat saying MAOW

Little girl to her mother: Awww! Norman says he's lonely and he wants us to adopt a kitten for him to play with!!

Cat, yelling: Stop misrepresenting me!

Cat, pouting behind his tail with a storm cloud over his head: That's NOT what I maowed.

February 10, 2020

A Craving for Something

Daughter: I have a craving for something, but I don't know what!

Me: What?? We just ate dinner and you said you were full!

Daughter, swanning away: ...but WHAT?

February 5, 2020

Livin’ the Dream

I was having trouble concentrating during the meeting

Because out the window, just over my boss's shoulder, there was a crow circling

And when it landed, I would see that it was carrying a whole sandwich.

Me, thinking: livin' the dream...

February 1, 2020

Groundhog Day

Father and daughter walking together. Daughter: "Daddy, what is Groundhog Day?"

"It's the day when the groundhog comes out of his burrow. If he sees his shadow, then there will be 6 more weeks of winter."

Daughter: Oh, I see.

And what is a "week"?

Flashback to when she was 3 years old.

January 20, 2020

Lucid Dreaming

Whoa! I'm floating!

Usually this only happens to me in dreams...

...but now it's happening to me in really life! FINALLY! (The woman's hair has turned green. She is holding a floating rabbit on a string. Her daughter has turned into a houseplant and is asking to go to the park.)

Image of search bar with the words: lucid dreaming too dumb??

January 14, 2020

The Plunger

Child: MOMMY! Quick, I need the plunger!

Mom: What??

Child: Don't worry, I just need it to stabilize my fort!

Mom: WHAT??